THOR made me cry

The week was quite  uneasy . Apart from work, been discovering a lot of new revelations these past few days.

Last night, an old friend who is here in Manila for a one week vacation called me. She asked me if i could join her hubby drink the night out. They had been living in Australia for quite some time na and so kelangan din naman nyang mag relax since living in a foreign country is different here in the Philippines.  Perfect timing, coz i really wanna get drunk this weekend. And so i said “hell yes”. So i drove her hubby and a friend to my favorite spot here in Manila. I found Oli, my friends hubby real nice. We discussed our favorite subject,  “music”. He also plays the guitar. So madali kaming nag jell together with  my other friend. I was able to get home by 4 am. Lucky for me coz i consumed more than the average amount of alcohol i should have. Wala namang gasgas yung “kuliglig” ko, haha.

Woke up at 10 am, and after my usual routine of checking e-mails, stalking some FB friends and reading those ridiculous Facebook shoutouts, i decided to watch a movie at MOA. I was a bit surprise na lahat ata ng palabas sa MOA ay THOR. Though i was looking for something “feel good movie” , i decided to grab a ticket for THOR. Actually I am a SuperHero Movie Fanatic. Lahat ata ng super heroes movies wala akong pinalampas kahit isa. Minsan nga pati Captain Barbell sa TV pinapanood ko, haha.

At first i thought THOR is an ordinary super hero movie. But it was not. Halfway sa movie, i was  teary eyed. I dunno, but there is a  scene there which just caught me. And so i didnt blink an eye throughout the movie. It was wonderful to be mesmerized again by cinematic special effects with such gigantic proportions. But other than that, the movie just caught me. At the end of the movie i was crying. Buti na lang madilim at walang nakakakita. Kasi kung hinde sasabihin nila “Pambihira naman to, tao ba to? Umiiyak e action super hero yung pelikula”.  The movie ended with these lines . THOR : Can you see Jane ?  THE EYE : Yes I can see Jane  THOR: What is she doing?  THE EYE : Shes searching for you. . . THE END

But of course Jane is being played by Natalie Portman. I am a Natalie fan eversince. First time na mapanood ko sya sa movie na THE PROFESSIONAL, di ko na sya nilubayan kakatingin hehehe. Yup i did watch THE BLACK SWAN siempre but thats another story.

And so after watching the movie there is this thought na naglalaro sa utak ko. Could it be possible na somewhere in between our universe, there is this someone who is watching me. Could it be possible na there is a duplicate of me at some other time beyond our time.  Could it be possible to live another life after death. I was beginning to re-ask myself who really controls everything. Who really sees us what we are  doing.

Napaka misteryoso talaga ng buhay. ITs not just like chocolates after all. I am on my 40′s now. Sooner or later, i know that i have to END. How can you really live a LIFE if sa kokonting panahon na lang na natitira sa buhay mo gugulin mo pa sa galit. KUng nakakapag create ka ng friendship, why do you  have to unfriend anyone. Why? Especially kung importante sa yo ang tao.

Then i remembered my favorite movie of all time, Youve Got Mail and this scene.

Kathleen Kelly: Well, who fights about that?
Joe Fox: Well, some people. Not us.
Kathleen Kelly: We would never.
Joe Fox: If only.
Kathleen Kelly: I gotta go…
Joe Fox: Well, let me ask you something. How can you forgive this guy for standing you up and not forgive me for this tiny little thing of… of putting you out of business?

Then after eating my burger and fries, dumaan ako sa grocery. Ill be cooking Adobo today, myAdobo, ill prepare dinner for my family. But before that, ill be mailing someone. Thank you God, you Hammered me again.

Life’s Little Treasures

And so after 5 long years of not seeing each other, the Jean Art reunited once again last night for an evening of fun and never ending exchange of college memories. The Jean Art is our Band of Brothers since college days, we were  the Lo Waist Gang of the 60′s and Bagets of the 80′s. The only difference is those groups are just products of imagination,groups that only exist in  movies  . . , OURS is real . . , and even GREATER.

I have many acquaintances but only FEW i consider as close friends.  Probably “dahil” when I was a child i use to play alone. There were times na mag cre create ako ng scene using my toys and visually i can produce my own world of imagination. I can play all day alone. Why Im saying this? Im saying that sometimes I just dont need someone to play with me, so when I invite you to be a friend and play with me, that means your special and I AM  TREATING YOU AS A DEAR FRIEND.

I think the greatest block a student will have to overcome before becoming a man  is when hes in  college. Kasi, pag college ka na, parang your on your own e. enough of High School Bukol Days. Kelangan pag college ka, you need to develop your own self, your own system. And thats when choosing your friends in college is extremely important. Kasi, when you decided to be with them, You just decided what YOU want to BE.

And I was LUCKY to be able to pick the right circle of friends. Kasi kung hinde, we met since we were 16 years old, and were on our  40′s now, siguro naman kung we didnt develop that so called FRIENDSHIP wala na…nagkalimutan na kami lahat. Kahit wala yang Facebook na yan which orchestrated lahat ng reunions . . .still we will find a way to meet siguro.

Para kaming mga bata ulit last night. And there were so many many fondful memories.Thanks again God for showing and being able to be received AGAIN some  TREASURES of LIFE. Thank you for my friends God. Thank you KASI KAHIT KONTI LANG  ang binigay mo sa kin parang binigay mo din naman lahat lahat. For that, I cant thank you enough God. Thank you for always bringing me laughter God.

Yup well meet again. They say pag tumawa ka daw at SUMASAKIT NA TYAN MO SA KAKATAWA . . that is a good dose of medicine. And i needed those medicines and I cant wait to grab another dose. * )

the Running Man in Me

My favorite QUIET TIME is when I’m running. Yup, i don’t know to some people but i get my deepest thoughts and serenity when I run. I usually run alone  every 5 am in the morning.  My ever willing companion is my iPod Nano equipped with christian songs.

And when running, I pray. I pray and thank Him for all the blessings He’s given me. I thank Him  for always Loving and Protecting me even if I SIN the greatest SIN of all.  He’s been all over me. I knew God Love me that much.

After running and completing my usual lap, I would sit down for a while and watch people around. Then i would grab my favorite “taho” from the usual “Mang” ” Manong”  taho vendor while staring on every runner I see.

Isn’t just amazing that there is this line of thought everybody is willing to run and converge in one place, at the exact moment, and at the exact time.

Then I would walk towards home and pray again.

Thank you God for always walking with me in times of troubles. Thank you God for always running with me whenever I thought things are too impossible.

Thank you for my feet God. They never fail to run with me. Thank you God. Thank you.

Goodbye

I decided to take a walk today  for  a snack in what used to be our secret place. I walked across those familiar streets, passed by this boarding house and this small pizza parlor where we used to have a quick snack and a quick meet. I had never felt this LOST before. I’ve been asking myself whats happening with me. I had my new life back, got a loving wife , a good family, great job, great friends around me. So why am I still thinking of YOU.

Why ?

While waiting for my baked mac, I remember the times when I usually meet her here. I check for the time and its 4 o’clock, this is the exact moment when I usually txt-tell her that Im already out from work and will meet her later. Those unforgettable memories, those scenes , they kept on flashing.

I did promise myself to wait for the right time to finally meet her again and probably have a cup of coffee talk.

But I guess, THERE IS NOTHING THERE TO WAIT.

Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering.

While I’m about to finish my meal, there is this thought that superimposed me. I should not hate you, coz the only thing I hate in you is the hurt i cause you.And so after waiting for months, I am officially letting GO of all your thoughts. I will not be waiting anymore coz I know your happy now. After all, the only thing that I ever wanted is to see you happy. And even though I wont see it with my naked eye, I knew, somehow you will be. Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Guess we wont be able to exchange these greetings at our favorite season, who knows someday, somehow , not in this world. Somewhere in a Garden not found here.

Bye ! Take good care .

Technological Blindness

I’ve been googling around lately about Facebook. Probably because i fell in love with the movie Social Network, it occurred to me  that somehow i can do just what Mark Zuckerberg just did. But i am not Mark, he is simply way beyond any ordinary techie and computer geniuses. According to Netcraft, as of this time, Facebook users ballooned to 500 million users wordwide. Now, thats really something.  In my office, Facebook is the all time high website hit among my users/staff. That is with the restriction that facebook is only  available from 12-1 (breaktime). Would you imagine if I don’t have a policy on internet services in my office. Facebook would simply kill those free time any staff will be enjoying.

But it is not about Facebook why i am so keen on googling about.  Its about why is it that Facebook officially allowed everyone to be a stalker.  I am, yes..i am one of them, i open FB just to see people i am interested in. I wanna know whats happening  with them, i wanna know what is keeping them busy, i wanna know their thought,is she sad, happy, alive . . i suppose.  FB gave us what the 19th century craved for. . .and that is being able to know MORE  about someone out there with just few clicks.

I hope someday, FB will shut down, i hope someday all these electronic lines connecting people and technology would just blow apart completely leaving us only  one thing,  a simple life.  Yes i am a techie, i love technology ..but this technology gave me something i cant live without. It made me a monster. It made me a God of my Own, and that is why sometimes i hate myself on knowing too much.

I miss my old me where i could simply spend a day plucking my guitar.

Today, i cant live without technology.

I stumble on this quote saying that “technology… is a queer thing.  It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other.”  

Truly enough, and sad to know that I cannot relive what I was before.  So sad that i can’t end this blog i am writing.

As Jean Arp once wrote, “Soon silence will have passed into legend.  Man has turned his back on silence.  Day after day he invents machines and devices that increase noise and distract humanity from the essence of life, contemplation, meditation…tooting, howling, screeching, booming, crashing, whistling, grinding, and trilling bolster his ego.  His anxiety subsides.  His inhuman void spreads monstrously like a gray vegetation.”

I love my life, i love living my life but i would have to use this technology to blog it.

Unfriend Me

Yup, i got your message. I got your message right. And so I am unfriending you . There will be nothing. No memories of you, no “Little Wonders” whatsoever.

Again

It was a day i’ve been waiting for. It has  been months since then. I cant remember the last time  i saw her. Until today, I could not believe it.  She is here, and i am actually staring at her. I’ve been waiting for this time to say hello AGAIN.

Slowly walking to her, she smiled back, the apple in the garden smiled at me.

I wish we could talk longer and exchange our stories…but then  again, somehow, i know, she doesnt want it anymore. Maybe this isn’t the time yet.

But even then, thank you . . .  for smiling at me. Your smile will always be here with me.

Until then, till we meet again.  I will always dream having  dinner with you again.

a not so princess tale at puerto, princesa

Ive been here at Puerto Princesa before. This is actually my second visit on the city. While i was walking along the streets of Puerto, I saw Circon and I remember it, thats the place we stayed during my first visit. We proceeded directly to our satellite office. Puerto didnt change much, maganda pa din at malinis ang ciudad. Bench is still there, ito yung familiar kong landmark.  Dalawa na ang Jollibee sa puerto. I heard magkakaron na din ng McDo which is my favorite among the two.

I still have the energy to fix their computers. I practically fixed 2 sets, ahhh, ang galing ko talaga!! Haha, just kiddin. I thought bawi na ang region sa pagpapadala sa kin knowing that di naman talaga fixing the computer and sadya ko. We are here to conduct a training in one of our special projects. But i guess, once you have the God given talent, you just simply share it and use it wherever and whenever you need it.

Its almost 3 pm when i finished the job of fixing. We decided to drop by at Bakers Hill. Mas maganda na sya ngayon ah. And it was covered with restaurants na unlike before, i enjoyed their pizza. I am a Pizza man remember? haha, then bought their delicious hopia for pasalubong.

Six PM when we decided to check in at Princess Hotel. Fully booked na yung usual aircon rooms nila, so we settled for a much cheaper room.  I even actually changed my supposed room and added 100 pesos kasi masyadong madilim at walang ventilation yung una kong nireserve.  Ok na din sana, but then found out madilim pa din. Ganun siguro talaga ang ilaw nila. With broken window, pumapasok yung lamok sa room ko so nagpabili ako ng katol while im seated sa medyo maruming chair and  table  while using my computer. My co-worker who is like a friend already felt uncomfortable. Di ko sya masisisi kasi madilim, barado ang CR, malamok yung hotel. The 5th time na nilapitan nya ko, i knew na nag-mamakaawa na sya na lumipat na kami though di nya masabi sa kin directly.

But when i heard na barado ang CR, nag-isip na ko, kelangan naming kausapin ang manager o kaya umalis sa lugar na yun. I negotiated pa nga, sabi ko kahit isang gabi lang sa mas mahal na room where walang lamok at medyo maliwanag. Di pumayag yung manager, di daw pede kasi yun ang price. I asked the manager to just try be considerate na lang kasi since matutulog lang naman kami ng ilang oras. In the end, kinuha ko yung bayad namin, minus 100 peso each for the abala.

Then we packed up, proceeded again sa satellite office. Upon seeing the bright light of the office, sabi ko “may tao pa”. Its almost 8 pm then. And, we were thankful. Kasi may inabot kami, kung wala malaking abala na naman gagawin namin.

As we were exchanging our anxieties and frustration sa hotel, my co worker told me that she was uncomfortable because she knew that there is something strange about the hotel.  The hotel is an old wooden house located sa pinakadulo ng place. She told me, that she felt something, and that something you know is a creepy something . Sabi ko, “ako din naman, hindi maganda yung vibration ko sa hotel”.

Then, she told me, that meron syang third eye. she continued, back when im negotiating with the manager at iniwan ko sya pansamantala sa room , sabi niya “may nakita akong shadow, dalawang beses” . It creeped me out. Coz, i know, she is telling the truth.

Masyado lang positive ang acceptance ko kaya tinatalo nya ang ano mang negative energies sa room na yun.

And yes, we are definitely not coming sa hotel na yun, at least dun sa old house na yun. Creepy, that old house has something you cant explain.

But you know what? That turned to be a blessing in disguise cause after that stories, we end up on a nice cool savvy hotel . Oh, the first thing i saw the facade of Skylight Hotel, i felt “wow”. And wait till you the pic below. Hay, guminhawa pakiramdam namin. Parang sigh of  relief….thank you, thank you……ill never forget about it, this thing, this happening. Thank you God for giving us an angel to save us from hell.

Simpleng Buhay

Halos di ko naramdaman ang galaw ng eroplano papuntang Romblon.  Noong una, natatakot akong sumakay, kasi naman sabi nila, maalon daw pag naglayag ka sa barko, magalaw daw sa taas pag nag eroplano ka naman. Sa isang maliit na komersyal na eroplano ako sumakay. Akala ko noong una yung mga ganitong klaseng eroplano ay mahirap pagtiwalaan. Suguro, magaling lang talaga ang piloto na naghatid sa amin ditto sa Romblon. Maayos kaming nakalapag.

Ang Odiongan ay isa sa mga probinsya ng Romblon. Akala ko wala akong makikita sa Romblon kundi mga marmol at mga naglalakihang alon ng dagat. Kung ilalarawan ko, ang Odiongan Romblon ay parang isang maliit na subdibisyon sa Quezon City. Subalit ang malaking pagkakaiba lang, higit na tahimik dito, wala yata akong nakitang taong nakahubad, wala akong nakitang nag-iinuman sa kalye, walang malakas na tunog ng mga stereo ng mga kapitbahay. Isa itong perpektong komunidad. May simbahan, paaralan, palengke,  di ka gugugol ng maraming hakbang para mapuntahan mo ang gusto mong puntahan.

Sa kabilang dulo ay mararating mo ang Tablas Strait, ito ang dagat na pumapalibot sa Romblon. Sandali ko siyang tinignan at napangiti sa hiwaga ng buhay.  Simple lang naman talaga ang buhay tutuusin, tao lang talaga ang nagpapakomplikado ng lahat. Kung ang lahat ng tao ay di masyadong mangangarap, siguro walang masyadong problema tayong dadanasin. Pero ganun talaga e, kelangan mong mangarap at kelangan kong marating ang di ko naman alam kung saan. Diyos lang naman talaga ang nakakaalam ng lahat e.

Natanong ko lang sa sarili ko, may mga tao pa kayang nangangarap ng simple, may mga tao pa kayang kuntento na sa binigay na yaman ng Diyos.

Bumalik ulit ako sa hotel na tinutuluyan ko, sabi ko, i blo blog ko to, gusto kong basahin ulit ang larawan sa isip ko. Di ko dala camera ko, pero, malinaw ang nasa isip ko. Salamat po Panginoon sa haplos mo sa kin kanina. Salamat po at kahit paminsan minsan tinatapik mo ko, sinasabihan na Dahan dahan lang, ang buhay ay sapat na para ipagpasalamat. Simple di ba?



Erratum: “Jologs”

Kaibigan, alam kong masakit ang aking mga nabitiwan. Ngayon alam ko na kung bakit ka ganyan. Huli man itong aking paghingi ng paumanhin, sana . . . iyong maintindihan . .na may mga bagay na mas madaling isulat kaysa isawalam bahala lang. Kung ako may nagkamali . . PATAWAD!!

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